i

have a problem with the truth.

I

should probably get my anxiety in check, today after viciously honking my horning screaming/raging out of the window I almost followed the dumb fuck (insert racial slur) to wherever he was going to and lay his dumb ass out. I was so mad I was visibly shaking. Granted he tried pulling some nig shit to the cars in front of me, then to me..um excuse me? I know you see my demolish derby ass xterra get the fuck out of my way. Usually I am so Idk, I have slight road torrets anyway but I am not so quick to want to manhandle a man and make him cry, but I swear I could have..but I needed to make it to the flea market and do my laundry so I had a limited time schedule to work with. That sentence sounds like I do my laundry at the flea marker, I don't. Got tipped twenty on a thirty, thank you sir.


I have a lot to say, a lot but I just can't bring myself to face/say them outloud.

All I do is think, people have been saying "jill, youre so quiet." "jill whats up with you" I just have to shrug it off. Lots of things are up with me, and I'm thinking so I'm quiet. I'm annoyed with everything, so I'm quiet. Things aren't okay and I haven't a clue what I want with anything or anyone. I just want to be alone/with milo or with my best friend. But that plan is shot to hell, so in turn I feel even more lost.

Portland? shall I? or will I just be more miserable and alone than I already feel.

I feel jumbled, unstable, bittersweet, used, more jumbled, any adjective for jumbled, scrambled, chopped, covered, (lol wafflehouse) loaded and unloaded. I feel alone, just alone. cause and effect I guess.

annoyance: when people say sec, like gimme a sec. I can not stand sec instead of second.

hormones, helloooo.

rant blog

and if you don't like it, then don't read it. I have seriously had the worst two days in a looong time. So I am about to unleash, then probably delete. gfy.


things i can not stand; I am a relatively nice person unless you have crossed me or are just a rude bitch, I tolerant a lot of shit and have more than a ridiculous amount of patience for the ignorant. But fuck, are you kidding me? I am not retarded, so to talk to me like I am will only end in me being a mega bitch.. The thing is that I don't get how people even get to that side of me, like you must be a real fuck up..aahem.



my nails have gotten long enough for typing to be an annoyance, buh. whatever. On top of that I'm supposed to go to georgia wed-friday.....now that's not happening and it makes me want to headbutt a baby. I neeeed to get away. I need to see my family and I need to see Alison and just have best friend fun.

They've been saying florida summers are all rain, makes me want the city all that much more.

IM STARVING.

orlando tomorrow. fifty buck tip on one party today....helloooo blue skies.


NOT, because Florida is flooding.

but seriously, need to keep saving. $$$$$$ need to live right next to the beach.

need to sleep early. got sanuks as a gift. buh. that's really it, just buh on everything.. this rain. I am in like no sun mode so shit's all gloomy and i gave in to the tanning bed today.

then went to get my nails done, no one is open past seven here..wtf? georgia is like till nine. fml.

made

like ninety bucks last night. Getting to the homestead at two am, does suck..but the money is worth it.

Drunk irishmen is what mainly fills the nights, both entertaining and annoying.



buuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuhhhhhhhh, buh buh black sheep have you any wool?

i

love you.


it's hanging on the tip of my tongue I just can't ever let it out.

Happy Birthday You

got me straight trippin boo.




In all seriousness....lots of trippage. I'm all confused and unsure, of everything.

screaming gets you no where.





always.
always and I won't ever be able to help it.
It's embarrassing.

naughty bits

unloaded more shit.


packed shit i didnt mean too. ended up re reading.

buuuh, why is everything so complicated. ready for a nest.

it's official

I've gone brain dead, I must have because of the amount of absolute brain dead things I do.

I like the new yeah yeah yeahs stuff.
Louder, lips speak louder
Better back together
Still it’s a shock, shockto your soft side
Summer moonCatch your shut eye
In your room, in my room.


Love my name
Love left dry
Frost or flame
Skeleton me
Fall asleep
Spin the sky
Skeleton me
Wait, don't cry
Love, don't go
Love, don't cry
Skeleton me
Skeleton me
Soon comes rain
Dry your eyes
Frost or flame
Skeleton me
Fall asleep
Spin the sky
Skeleton me
Love, don't cry
Love, don't cry
Love, don't cry
Skeleton me
Skeleton me
Skeleton

okay that's it. I'm kind of over blogspot as a whole. It just reminds me how retarded everything is.